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Ever wonder why even the simplest exchanges can sometimes go completely off the rails? Communication can be tricky but even if we are masters of both our verbal and non-verbal language things can still get thoroughly tangled up. Despite our best intentions and efforts we can nevertheless end up frustratingly confused or frustratingly misunderstood.
Even the simplest exchanges are never truly simple. In the average conversation it may seem like there are only two people involved but the truth is there are actually multiple versions of ourselves and the other person in play. We each bring three of them with us which means in every exchange there are six ‘ghosts’ to be contended with. Our core truth, the version of that truth we intend to project, and the version which the other person sees matched by a parallel three ‘ghosts’ from the other person.
Even if all three of our ‘ghosts’ are consistent and well-aligned there is still plenty of room for confusion and misinterpretation. And the greater the disparity between the three versions of ourselves the greater the potential for confusion. Our best chance to be clear and understood is to be aware of our ‘ghosts’ and make all possible efforts to ensure they accurately portray our intended message.