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We all like the idea of being someone who can handle anything, who is always able to find a solution, who remains unwavering and steady as a rock in the face of any challenge or crisis. There is an admirable nobility to being able to solve our own problems without being dependent on anyone else and those blessed with the affinity and resources for self-reliance very often become the ones others turn to when they need guidance or support.
It makes sense. Self-reliant people always seem to have their affairs sorted out which means they are more rarely in confused states of crisis and have workable solutions to offer. Any ongoing group, be it family or friends or professional, will instinctively anchor itself around any of its self-reliant members. They wind up being the mediators, peace-keepers, problem solvers, counselors, confidants, the rails which keep the train on the tracks.
This tends to be a fairly symbiotic arrangement. Self-reliant types are all too often happy to do for others as they have already done inside themselves. They have already managed their own internal surprise and emotional reactions, engaged the critical analysis muscles, come up with possible solutions, trouble-shot those ideas, then put them into action, all while frequently showing little to no outward…