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Do You Feel Better Now? Spoiler Alert : I Know You Don’t, Not Really

Jeff Fox
7 min readMar 12, 2020

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An open letter to those who shout hatred at strangers.

Photo by Armin Lotfi on Unsplash

I don’t know the specifics of your life experiences. I don’t know the particulars of your circumstances growing up, the ideas and ideologies you were exposed to, the behaviors you had modeled for you. I don’t know the details of your current situation, what stresses or anxieties you might be facing. But I do know that your yelling has very, very little to do with me. All the epithets and anger and accusations are much more about your own fears and feelings of powerless than the stranger you are aiming them at.

Anxiety is understandable, even anger and fear. Fear of the unknown is natural and normal, we all feel it when confronted with something we don’t understand. And we are living in a world filled with stresses, struggles, inequalities, and crises. It’s no small wonder people are feeling exhausted and frustrated. But lashing out at other people, villainizing and blaming those you perceive as different, does about as much to genuinely solve your troubles as honking your horn does to break up traffic jams.

I don’t know if you truly believe shouting insults and condemnations and threats will actually change or get rid of the people you target. Maybe you do. Maybe you’ve bought into the action movie formula implying every…

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Jeff Fox
Jeff Fox

Written by Jeff Fox

A professional dancer, choreographer, theatre creator, and featured TEDx speaker with an honours degree in psychology, two black belts, and a lap-top.

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